Wednesday, June 18, 2008

The case against Cinnabons.

The guy I once traveled with for work no longer travels with me. Hasn't for months now, in fact. However, when he did, I could always count on him to a) be the last one to board our flight, b) forget to bring his passport if we were headed to Canada (okay, just that once) and c) never finish his Cinnabon.

Would he always buy a Cinnabon? Yes, even if they had to hold the plane for him to do it. Would I? Never. Didn't have to. I knew he would never finish that gooey center, which he would inevitably offer to me. I, in turn, would inevitably gobble it up. It was like eating a doughnut hole the size of an actual doughnut. It was exactly what I craved, needed and came to expect.

Today, I walked by the Cinnabon makers in the airport and felt weak. The smell now ignites a Pavolvian response in me. Luckily, I have friends to help me in situations like this. If I've learned anything in training for my upcoming race, it's that having someone to be accountable to helps me to keep running as much as I'm supposed to. So. I called out via text message with the urgent query: "Tell me I don't need a Cinnabon. Please." They helped. Mostly. The end tally was something like 18 telling me to run away from the sweet, sweet cinnamon smells and nearly 10 trying to talk me into doing otherwise. What follows are actual responses typed out to me in my time of need:

"YOU DO and YOU WILL. How else you going to power that fine-tuned machine you call a body?"

"Uh, remember how you weigh 200 lbs? No Cinnabon! Tough love, baby."

"Yes you do ... it is good for your belly. Just think ... you could have a belly like mine."

"Do you want a bigger a--?"

"Resist! You are better than that treat!"

"You do need one. 2 in fact. Or a sweet substitute ... but we work pretty far away so I'm afraid I won't be able to fill in 4 Cinnabon."

"Step away from the lard roll. It will make your butt fat."

"But you do. You always will. They are the essences of living."

"You deserve one." (sent from the very person I once traveled with)

"I'm afraid I can't do that."

"Girls like boys who look like they just say no to those things."

"If you eat one, it will go straight to your heart and clog all the arteries and you will be dead within seconds. Do not indulge REPEAT do not indulge!"

In the end, there was no indulging. This is my thank you to the universe that swayed me in the proper direction. You know, I could have just saved myself a lot of time and agony and just listened to this guy (clickity click). If anybody knows his foods, it's Jim Gaffigan.


frog said...

What a good morning chuckel. Thanks.

Ems said...

that is a Jim Gaffigan I hadn't heard yet! oh that man, so awesome. and way to pass on the Cinnabon.

Melanie said...

I love Cinnabon. If I flew more I'd weigh twice as much than I do now.

Sara said...

I love Cinnabons so much. I would have told you to eat one if I knew how to text message. And if you had asked.

My friend used to work there, and a few years ago she served one to Alice Cooper when he was in town for a show. I love that story.

melray1134 said...

Glad you resisted. Now that the aroma is gone, you're happy you did, eh?

The Vastbinders said...

Love your blog!....and love Cinnabons too. :)

SJ said...

hilarious texts back! There is defintely something to telling other people what you are trying to do and then feeling accountable for it. I used to try to lose weight by secretly dieting and exercising, but it didn't work so well. Peer pressure to eat fatty foods and stay out all night so I wouldn't go running in the morning would always win. I have stayed the same 20 lbs extra weight since my junior year of college. Then I joined Weight Watchers.

They encourage you to tell your friends and family and when they tempt you with food to tell them you need a supporter not an enabler. It works really well. If I don't want to cave in to that doughnut, piece of cake...or Cinnabon someone is wafting under my nose I just say "no thanks, I need the points" or "I don't really need that, I am determined to make my goals in Weight Watchers".

It seems it works much better when you tell everyone what you are doing because then you have to be accountable and they can cheer you on.

plainoldsarah said...

I saw a guy at the temple yesterday who looked just like you. then I saw his small belly and realized it couldn't be you because you don't eat cinnabons. then he stood up and was shorter. then he put on glasses. by then he was just some stranger. way to resist!