Wednesday, June 08, 2011

I hate it here when you're gone.





I miss $100 round trip tickets to Denver. I miss Sunday night flank steak, hot from the grill at my folks’ place. I miss sifting through so many of the good songs and playing them for a whole valley of listeners. I miss walking down snowy sidewalks and saddling up to acoustic shows in a neighborhood bar. I miss Crown Burger. I miss running into people I know unexpectedly. I miss singing with a band. I miss a time when I could date and feel like I knew what I was actually doing. I miss waking up in the mountains. I miss suddenly joining hiking trips and using them as excuses for long, drawn-out, intimate conversations. I miss a well-made, well-flavored taco. I miss those who hugged instead of handshaked. I miss gathering together a gaggle of friends and making them pancakes on a Saturday morning. I miss being understood. I miss owning long weekend vacations. I miss sisters who made babies and were eager to put them in my arms now and again. I miss enjoying an ever-rotating string of new bands and old musicians and the pleasantly supportive, slightly incestuous relationship they had with one another. I miss doing little more than traveling to new countries to talk to people about what they did for a living. I miss a different sort of comfort. I miss the same old, same old.

I like my new couch and how it took me a full week of sitting in it to finally know I’d chosen right. I like that I can walk out on my back patio into the pitch black and be quietly serenaded to by a band of so, so many crickets. I like the feeling of an old wooden floor from the 1950s underneath my bare feet. I like when my days are so impossibly filled up with so much of the blue skies and golden sunshine. I like celebrating a warm thunderstorm. I like that I live in a state with so much weird history tucked deep into its corners, every single weekend can lend itself to a myriad of new discoveries. I like that I get to kick off and spend a weekend with Wilco music and a tent out east, just me and a few thousand new like-minded friends. I like living less than two miles from the best black bean burrito and summer rolls w/ peanut sauce in the state. I like being able to write for my daily bread. I like happening upon old folks in a small town, dancing to live accordion music and allowing me to take a welcomed leap back in time. I like running full speed ahead into a kindred spirit. I like swimming during my lunch hour. I like blazing the unknowable path. I like clambering after this hope for more. 

8 comments:

Stef said...

Awesome. I agree on everything.

aisy said...

The words of change...

Looming Numen said...

I love this.

Team O'Connor said...

Well I think you would like DC so why don't you get your butt up here?

Sherpa said...

Agreed. Come on up!

Ms. White said...

i miss our antics in your pool. as i was sitting at the beach today i had a little flash back and it was sweet. xo

Stella said...

Crown Burger was one of the hardest partings I had when I left.

Allison Drinkwater Johnson said...

Amen, brother. Pancakes.